The Beatification of Elizabeth II, the Queen Gauche

Isn’t it suspicious that The Washington Post, CNN, The Guardian, The New Yorker… all bastions of left-wing propaganda are praising the late…

Isn’t it suspicious that The Washington Post, CNN, The Guardian, The New Yorker… all bastions of left-wing propaganda are praising the late queen?

“Et ses mains ourdiraient les entrailles du prêtre,
Au défaut d’un cordon pour étrangler les rois”

(“And his hands would weave the entrails of the priest,
For want of a cord to strangle kings”)

Les Éleuthéromanes, Denis Diderot, extreme left-wing zealot

Tsar Nicholas II — known as Saint Nicholas the Passion-Bearer in the Russian Orthodox Church — was executed alongside his family (including young children) by extreme left-wing zealots in the aftermath of the communist coup d’etat in Russia, in 1918.

A distant cousin of recently deceased Queen Elizabeth II, Nicholas II was denied asylum in the United Kingdom by her grandfather — King George V — on the basis that his presence would ruffle the feathers of local left-wing zealots, still healing from the wake-up call of WWI. This denial was a key stepstone to his execution. I suppose the Left wasn’t always too keen on human rights…

While Nicholas II was summarily executed by the revolutionary Left, Elizabeth II was never at imminent risk to her life. Much to the contrary, she thrived on the back of a Faustian bargain with the reformist Left. After two world wars, it was clear that God wouldn’t save the Queen, so the devil might just do that.

Elizabeth II and the reformist Left were accomplices in building a public profile that will be difficult to replicate in the age of social media. Such collusion becomes clearer when you note that, throughout her life, she or her actions were never truly the subject of any criticism, instead, the vitriol was always directed towards the monarchy as an institution or the British Empire itself.

On further analysis, once you get past the (thick) aura of praise and lore she was rewarded with by virtue of the Bargain, there’s very little substance to her. From the romanticisation of her role in WWII to the straight-out fictionalisation of her role in the Suez Canal Crisis, it is clear Her Majesty was a pop figurehead crafted to serve a purpose in the culture wars: do nothing.

No wonder she became synonymous with a person that projects great power but can do very little with it. But remember that “doing nothing”, as Edmund Burke puts it in the famous quote, is “the only thing necessary for the triumph of evil”. And Elizabeth II turned it into her brand of the art of survival.

Elisabeth Secunda Cunctator

And so the queen became gauche. Not gauche in the sense of socially awkward — far from it —, but gauche in the sense of someone who is left-leaning. In no unclear terms, she was a beacon of secular values and an instrumental agent in the slow-moving leftist reformation movement that characterises British Fabianism.

Whereas in republican democracies leaders tend to be evaluated in light of the practicalities of their 4 to 8-year terms (as they yield real power), monarchs need to be evaluated on totally different dimensions, with a special focus on how they affected the culture over their lifetime (as they yield symbolic power). In that sense, she was a typical reformed Fabian.

Fabianism is an exceedingly British brand of anti-Marxist, anti-revolutionary socialism very popular with the upper classes. The movement advocates gradual change, which might be almost imperceptible in the short term, but that builds into an unstoppable force as it accumulates over time.

It is clearly unfair to blame Elizabeth II for all the malaises of a centuries-old British monarchy forced to shapeshift from a relic of WWI into the standard-bearer of the post-WWII new world order in a couple of decades. To that effect, the myth of the WWII ambulance-driving princess worked like a charm for her.

But the reality is much more stern than that. Transformation also meant shrinkage was part of the Bargain, and shrinkage means failure for any empire.

Historically speaking, the United Kingdom is rapidly shrinking into inexistence. A hundred years ago, the British monarch would rule half a billion subjects over one-quarter of Earth’s surface… today there’s roughly 15% left of that. The world’s largest economy back then, barely cracks into the top 10 now. And they keep falling.

Also as part of her bargain, Elizabeth II neglected her role as the head of the Anglican Church, which became more woke by the day. While religiously that’s a moot point, the moral leadership the position draws from culture and tradition is nothing to sneeze at. But she was made to sneeze at it.

And that became her most everlasting, cherished mark: she redefined — better yet, deconstructed — the role of the monarchy. From an enlightened despot to a serviceable progress elitist. A dangerous prospect when you consider who is ascending to the throne after her…

While the dangers (and the perversity) of the monarchy as the fourth, moderating power are well documented; the post-modern alternative is even more dismal: the deep state — entrenched civil servants, big media, big business, big unions, NGOs, and their respective lobbyists... While presiding over the shrinkage of her empire, she oversaw the growth of the deep state. Hence the praise. The irony of her passing away in Aberdeen —the land of Macbeth — is not at all lost…

The rise of the deep state (and the multilateral world order) made Elizabeth II the quintessential example of the pet failed conservative the Left loves to love. A precursor to John McCain, Mitt Romney, and — as of last week— Liz Cheney. Under the cover of her natural conservatism — by birth, pedigree, and plumage —, she transitioned into a reformist.

She became the quintessential example of the pet failed conservative the Left loves to love

On the other end, she has been proclaimed a winner by the Left, and they’re not shy to highlight her main accomplishment was longevity. She was a master survivalist. The Teflon Queen. She took the faux blame for colonialism, slavery, and the plundering that built the British Museum, so her light-touch stance on the apartheid, Windrush, and Aberfan would dissipate in the cloud of vaporous sycophancy.

Even her light-touch stance on apartheid was dissipated in the cloud of vaporous sycophancy

Lizzie, Lizzie, Quite Contrary, How Does Your Garden Grow?

The nursery rhyme is thought to refer to Mary Tudor, the Queen that could not produce an heir (a tragedy in and of itself). But such tragedy pales in comparison to the inability of producing an heir worthy of the name; in the same way Elizabeth II’s symbolic death in life was more tragic than Nicholas II’s cold-blooded execution.

Of her issue, we need not worry about. Charles the Idiot, and Andrew the Pig. Harry the Gullible, and William the Insipid — whose main accomplishment so far was choosing a wife with a near-perfect bone structure. That’s a pretty unimpressive brood.

Just like Elizabeth II, though, William is made to look good in comparison to the field. The beggar thy neighbour approach, which seems to come as standard in the Bargain, might do the trick again…

So, there’s no risk we will be getting a new Alfred the Great, Canute, or Richard Lionheart anytime soon. But I here feel tempted to confess that Queen Consort Camilla intrigues me. First, how not to relate to her struggles with political correctness?

Not only she has the authenticity that Charles and William lack, but her story is also proof she possesses a stoicism Harry could never dream of. I’m not sure we’ll ever be wiser about how she fought back and earned her titles of Duchess of Cornwall and Queen Consort. Not to mention, she must be quite the feisty little dynamo in the bedroom, judging by how she managed to wreck Charles’ life. Bloody hell!

So, What’s the Story, Morning Glory?

“So höre: Wir wissen
Du bist unser Feind. Deshalb wollen wir dich
Jetzt an eine Wand stellen. Aber in Anbetracht deiner Verdienste
Und guten Eigenschaften
An eine gute Wand und dich erschießen mit
Guten Kugeln guter Gewehre und dich begraben mit
Einer guten Schaufel in guter Erde.”

(“Hear us then: we know
You are our enemy. This is why we shall
Now put you in front of a wall.
But in consideration of
your merits and good qualities
We shall put you in front of a good wall and shoot you
With a good bullet from from a good gun and bury you
With a good shovel in the good earth.”)

“Verhör des Guten” (Interrogation of the Good), Bertolt Brecht, extreme left-wing zealot

To avoid Diderot’s clerical noose, Elizabeth II had no choice but to accept Brecht’s good bullet. With grace and dignity, undoubtedly so, but she did it. Now it is for the left-wing propaganda machine to bury her with a good shovel.

Made into a British institution, she inaugurated the era of the secular, aesthetic monarch — all pomp and no circumstance — that has been emulated by other European social democracies, with varied success.

Culturally, economically, and geopolitically the United Kingdom’s lights have been severely dimmed under her watch. The most expensive renovation of the Overton window that the reformist Left was able to accomplish so far. With the Vatican remaining the crown jewel.

Optically, Elizabeth II’s passing away is a disaster for British unity. Few things could be worse for the United Kingdom in this day and age when they had four prime ministers in six years, on the backdrop of increasing talks of Ireland reunification and Scotland's independence. It is very a bad omen.

Optically, Elizabeth II’s passing away is a disaster for British unity. A very bad omen.

When reading the reaction to her death, I kept in mind that the measure of a conservative’s failures should always be the praise afforded to them by liberals. And it is clear now that Elizabeth II was the anti-Victoria.

If you think it is too far-fetched to impinge on her the mark of a Fabian leftist, bear in mind that under her watch the United Kingdom became the land of socialised health care, mostly unhinged abortion, gun confiscation, out-of-control immigration, and submissiveness to EU rule.

She took over the UK of Elgar, Constable, and Jane Austen and is passing on the land of the Rolling Stones, Banksy, and Harry Potter; of the tabloids, BBC4, and the Tate Modern. She inherited the United Kingdom of Great Britain. She delivered the Divided Kingdom of Little Britain. This should be the definitive indictment of her reign.

She inherited United Kingdom of Great Britain. She delivered the Divided Kingdom of Little Britain.